Friday 15 June 2012

A wrecked room...and a MOO point.

Little sisters/cousins are pests, right? I beg to differ. They are pure evil, sent on mother earth to destroy good people. Oh they look cute and act sweet in front of old people because they have the power to turn the evil 'kids' into good ones. No, these children show their true colours (and horns) to their older sisters/brothers, who were once evil too but changed due to their hidden goodness.
So for 7-10 years the younger evils make the older siblings/cousins' lives miserable to influence them on joining their Bad-Ass land.
I know one such devil, my 7 year old cousin called...Devilina (thats just a fictitious name I am going to use).
So Devilina decides to visit her smart, intelligent, average-looking cousin...Angelina (Read: Me. Fictitious name again) with her parents.
Angelina is sitting in her room, playing her keyboard, unknown to the horrible catastrophic situation that is about to befall her.

"Didiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii"
"Oh. My. God", Angelina says under breath.
"Didiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii! Piano piano piano piano!", Devilina gracefully snatches away the keyboard and jabs at the black and white keys.
"Um...Devilina, its run by batteries, they will run out soon and I really needed to practice", Angelina carefully tries to pry away the little nail bitten fingers from her instrument.
"Nooooooo! I want to play! I want to play! MUMMA!"
"Shhh! Ok, how about this, I play it for you? Anything you like"
Devilina gives her this very confused look and then smiles her evilish smile.
"You can't play! Liar liar, pants on fire!"
"I can too!" Angelina says in this very mature manner.
"Liar liar liar liar..."
"Stop it! Look, I will prove it to you. Just let me have that god forsaken piano! I will teach you. What would you like to learn?"
"Twinkle Twinkle!", Devilina says, still not letting go of the keyboard.
"Ok. Twinkle Twinkle it is then! Just let me have the piano, please!"
As soon as Devilina relaxes her hold on the object, something vibrates.
"Holy crap! Earthquake!" Angelina shouts.
Suddenly her attention is caught by the blinking cell phone.
"Hahaha! Scaredy cat!" Devilina sings.
"Shut up! I knew it was the mobile. Now hush! I am on phone"
Devilina obediently shuts up and goes around the big desk which has a gazillion drawers, always a good thing to distract the evil people.
"Hello? Hey! What's up?"
"YOU PROMISED!", Devilina shrieks out of nowhere.
"Huh? Wha--?"
"YOU PROMISED YOU WILL TEACH ME!"
"Um..yes, but Didi is now on phone. Give me 5 minutes and I promise I will teach you Twinkle Twinkle AND abcd" (To those who dont know, Twinkle Twinkle and abcd have the same tune, thus work done easier)
"So where were we...? DEVILINA! STOP TAKING MY THINGS OUT FROM THE DRAWERS!"
"Won't won't won't!"
"Oh God. I am so sorry, Ananya! Its my cousin and---WHAT? You and Amay broke up?! But how?! Why?"
"Tell her it will be ok", Devilina buzzes near Angelina's ear.
"Huh? Devilina! Stop eavesdropping! I mean, listening! And what do YOU know about break ups? You are just a 7 year old...thing"
"I know. I broke up with Tushar today", Devilina declares proudly.
"You WHAT? You didn't have a boyfriend in the first place! Stop making up stuff"
"Did too!"
"Get lost! Sorry again, Ananya! So yes, why did you break up?"
"Because he wouldn't share his orange crayon with me!", Devilina pipes in.
"I am not talking to you, Devilina! This call is important, OK? Please excuse me" Angelina makes shooing motion with her free hand.
"I DO NOT LIKE YOU!", and to somehow prove her point, Devilina presses the "song" button on the keyboard and then rushes off to the cupboard, throwing every piece of cloth that Angelina owned on the floor.
"STOP IT! Ananya, I will have to get back to you later! Stop crying, please!"
"CRY BABY CRY BABY!", Devilina says in this sing song voice, while Angelina quickly hangs up before her friend could hear that.
"Devilina, STOP MAKING A MESS! I will have to call your mother!"
"No care no care no care!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH", Angelina stops the annoying music.
"Hahahaha! You are funny! You are funny LOOKING!"
"Shut up! It took me ages to arrange everything in that cupboard! Please leave it alone! OK, I will teach you Twinkle Twinkle, abcd AND Baba Black Sheep" (All three same. Check it)
"Promise?"
"Yes! Promise!"
"God promise?"
"God promise!"
"Pinky swear?"
"Yep! Pinky swear!"
"No crosses?
"See? No crosses!"
"What about toes?
"OK look", Angelina takes off her shoes. "No crosses here, either. Now will you please--"
"Cross your heart?"
"Yes! Cross my heart and hope to die"
"DON'T DIE!"
"No no! I meant---Oh what would you know! Just know that I am not going to break the promise. Promise!"
"You know, Banana should not cry"
"Huh? Who?"
"Banana! Your friend!"
"Its Ananya, Devilina!"
"Anya? Anyway, she should not cry. Break ups keep happening. Tell her not to give her crayons to the boy anymore. Simple"
"If only it were that simple, Devilina"
"It is! IT IS!"
"OK OK! Calm down. You make such MOO points!"
"What points?"
"MOO. You will understand when you are old enough to watch Friends"
"You are weird. I watch my friends everyday!"
"Yeah, I pity them. Anyway, so are you ready to learn your songs?"
"Nope"
"What? I thought you wanted---"
"Nope nope nope!"
"But---"
"Devilina! Time to go home!", my Aunt calls.
"Tata, MOO!"
"I am not MOO!"
"You are too!"

And she goes away.

Guess who had to spend the whole night cleaning up everything? You got it.


~~The Girl

4 comments:

  1. Hahahahaha..that was one hell of a day and you might experience such days every now and then when devilina comes by :P
    Interestingly i have heard people saying about their lil sis and bro like that.I have had my share of experiences with my cousin little brother(when he was about that age of devilina :P )
    But seriously my lil cousin sisters each and every one are angel..literally i mean they go on talking and talking :P and yeah one of my lil sis said one fine day i have a boy friend and i am like :o does your mom and dad know? And she smiles like an angel and says no and warns you are not gonna tell them either :/
    I love my lil cousin sisters :)
    As she grows up she will know how to show that she cherishes you :)
    And awesome write-up..after a long time i am smiling after reading something inspite of me being sick :P

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I guess all little cousins are nice from within, though its hard for me to believe that for now =P

      And yours sound adorable! =D

      Hope you feel better soon!

      Delete
  2. OMG, I can almost see a flashback of whatever my cousins did, except the bf and moo part however! :D Nice write! thanks for this post!!

    ReplyDelete

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